I'm not really sure
where this is going but hang in there with me and let's see if I can
make something of this. I'm currently sat at my kitchen table typing
away - belly full after creating some kind of aubergine lasagna for
dinner alongside a big hearty salad and some freshly baked bread. I'm
feeling content. I'm feeling free. I can't get enough of this simple
life. Seven months ago - I packed my bags and started off on my summer
adventure in the mountains. Now seven months on - I'm living alone
in the place that I am so lucky to now call my home; Malonno, Italy.
I'm 22 years old and
I'm living alone in a foreign country where my language skills aren't
great. Wouldn't you think I'd be lonely? Wouldn't you think I'd get homesick? Well the answer is yes. Sometimes I do feel lonely.
Sometimes I do get homesick and miss my family. Sometimes I long to
wake up and be able to start the day around the breakfast table with
my parents. Sometimes I'd do anything to be able to run to the top of
Little Hill above Llandrindod Wells and feel the strong welsh wind
caress my face and the bog in my shoes and be in a place that I know
like the back of my hand. Of course I feel these things. My whole
life has rearranged and everything has changed. But it's normal. It's normal to miss the
past, the old you, the things that have happened, the childhood that
makes you who you are. But isn't it so wonderful when you wake up one
day and realise you are the person in charge of your
life. Your life is a vast glowing empty page and you can make the
story move in any direction you choose.
And so I'm living alone
and I'm learning to grow up. I'm learning how to adult, even though
sometimes I feel like adulting is soup... and I am a fork. I'm learning
that you need to call yourself out on your own shit because there's
no one there to do it for you. Mostly I'm going with the idea that
nothing can stop me from building this magical, inspiring,
invigorating life that I want to create for myself. I don't have to
try to move mountains. I just have to breathe – in, out and be me.
And I feel so full of gratitude to have this opportunity to build my
life here, in Malonno - the home of mountain running. The place that first inspired me almost three years ago. To be able to hang out the
kitchen window and watch the last rays of sunlight kiss the mountain
tops before dusk. Alpine glow - has anyone ever told you how
beautiful it is? You just wait until you see it with your own eyes.
I'm here because I long to be in a place where my dreams have the
opportunity to run off the edges of the world. Here my dreams reach
up to the tops of the mountains, up into the sky and touch the stars.
Here I don't just feel the magic of Malonno... I feel my own.
I'm a firm believer
that everything comes to you at the right moment. You just have to be
patient, grateful and work hard for what you want. When I first
started out running I couldn't of ever imagined the opportunities being involved in this sport have given me. In fact I still
remember as a twelve year old qualifying to run for Wales for the
first time at a cross country race in Ireland and being so full of
excitement and enthusiasm for the opportunity to go to another
country and represent my own. Fast forward almost ten years and I'm
so humbled to be able to say I've just signed my first two-year
contract with adidas TERREX and am joining the #oneteam alongside truly inspiring human beings. I'm beyond excited for this development in my running career and am so looking forward to where this journey will take me and the doors this will open. Sometimes I still have to pinch myself that all this is real. Needless to say I'm so full of inspiration and enthusiasm right now. The 2020 mountain running season is still just over two months away but I'm looking forward to heading to Fuerteventura next month for the adidas TERREX team training camp. I can't wait to meet all the other athletes and get this ball rolling. I feel like this really is the start of something wonderful. A huge you for adidas TERREX for this amazing opportunity and to the people that helped make it happen.
And so really what do I want to say with this rambling blog post? I guess what I want to say is - it's okay if you don't have it all figured out yet. Wherever you want to be, whatever dream it is that you want to come true, whatever you want to do with your life... You will get there. But right now, you are here. You are alive and you are breathing. You are dreaming and you are believing. Take it easy. Don't over complicate things. Live your simple life. You are free. How wonderful is that.
there is strength
in waiting
courage
in silence
dreams
in depths
truths
in time
Until next time,
Heidi x
