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Monday 28 September 2020

starting over

Hey there!

Thanks for stopping by. It's time for a new start. 

And so, I've decided I want to write more. Or infact that I need to write more. When I write, I feel like I can write myself towards a better version of myself. I become truer to myself and able to face life with more honesty, compassion and empathy. When I write it comes from a creative space inside me which I've silenced for too long. It's finally time to listen. 

And so every week, you can find me here, sharing some words, thoughts and snippets from my daily life with the world. Maybe it'll just be something I put out there for myself, for my family back in the UK to read and to feel closer to me. Or maybe a few other people will be interested and read it too. Who knows? Either way, I've been feeling like I need an anchor to keep myself swimming above the rough seas of 2020. Writing can be that anchor for me. 2020 is teaching me that whether you're alone or not - you just gotta keep moving forward. 

The journey of the pen across the page, or fingertips across the laptop keyboard is like life. Sometimes all you have to do is take a deep breath, turn the page and learn to trust yourself and the lines of the story again. 

This seems kinda particularly relevant now as I'm almost ready to start back running again after a persisting niggle. This is my opportunity to start afresh. To find a better relationship, a better balance with exercise, health and life. This is the part where I put all the mistakes I've ever made under my feet and use them as stepping stones to become the sustainable, healthy and strong athlete I know I can be - the person I want to be.  

This is the part where I forgive myself, for real this time. For running on empty, for all the repercussions this has caused. Because I know life is too short to spend another day at war with myself. 

I'm here, living in Malonno, in the mountains, my magic place. I'm where I want to be. I moved here to follow my dream of becoming a professional athlete but a year on I've found so much more than I was looking for. Now everyday, I'm learning how to heal, how to grow as a person - but ultimately I'm learning how to be better. The grass isn't greener on the other side of the fence, no. The grass is greener where you water it. 



You can choose the pain of staying where you are, or you can choose the pain of growth. Time to start growing. My wings have always been there, I've just somehow forgotten how to use them along the way. It's time to stop holding myself back.  It's time to fly. 


The comeback is always stronger than the set back. Remember that. 

Sending positive vibes into your week

Heidi 💛


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